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Like every other woman across America, I am longing to hear those three little words--Back to School. If you're like me, you are on your last nerve trying to entertain kids who are now B-O-R-E-D with everything. In fact, I figure my job as a mother is done, if at the end of summer vacation my kids respond to the question "Do you want to go to the beach?" with "No--we're bored with the beach!" I've managed to earn the same response to the question "Do you want to go to the pool?" My kids are so bored with having fun, they are begging to go back to school. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
I got so tired last week trying to entertain these now bored kids in these last few dog-days of summer that I forgot about taking them to the library to make them read, forgot about trying to make them go outside every minute and play, forgot about trying to save the poor cat, who has been put in every box we have this summer, put together to form tunnels, and castles, and airplanes and well--cat houses--that I actually broke down and spent $300 from my first book royalty check to buy them a Wii game system from Nintendo. Now, don't judge me too harshly. I was desperate to save that poor cat! I was willing to pay anything to have some peace for the last three weeks of summer vacation, not interrupted by bickering, shrieking, or loud bangs of unknown origin. Just getting the Wii required motherly heroism of epic nature! My many trips to the local electronic superstore to purchase the Wii has resulted in so many laugh-in-my-face "Lady, are you crazy?" comments, that I was desperate. I resorted to flying to New York, to make my way to the Nintendo store at Rockefeller Center, where I pushed other weaker moms out of my way and walked over their writhing bodies on the floor to bring home the Wii to my needy kids. I'm kidding of course--but that's my story to my kids and I'm sticking to it. The truth is, I was in town on business--that rare week when a tornado touched down in Brooklyn, and all the subways shut down, and it was a hundred degrees, and Manhattan was a parking lot, and every cab we got into we ended up abandoning because we could walk faster, and---gees, I needed some peace and quiet when I got home! Abracadabra--Wii to go!
Alas, the Wii has proved to be like a big dose of sugar--making my kids giddy with excitement and hyperness for a week, only to burn them out with a hangover of overstimulation. Now I'm back to trying to save the cat. Hey, can you say you really lived your childhood well if you haven't spent the last days of your summer vacation mindlessly watching cartoons sitting on the couch and eating Fruit Loops out of the box, until your eyes get red and you get a headache? My job as a mother? DONE!
You go Kim!
Posted by: stephanie | August 20, 2007 at 05:31 PM